Friday, August 5, 2011

Hello???

sound of microphone screeching..

sound of Choleesa clearing her throat

"Is anyone out there??"
I know, Ive been gone a while, and it would serve me right if you all had moved on to someone elses world, and left my desolate, and lonely world to fall by the weigh side/weighside/wayside (which one is it??)

So here is where I have been......
Mama H had a baby, and I was there for the entire thing!!! (Probably the best thing to have happened in my world for quite some time.) Now hold on to something, cause HERE is where we freefall....


My uncle developed stomach cancer, and has also had said stomach removed. Did you KNOW that you could live without a stomach??? I did not.
He is doing ok,  if that is what you would call it.  His spirits are good, but his physical appearance gives me cause for pause. (I guess intensive chemo and radiation will do that)
My hubbys father has thus far remained sober, however, two weeks ago, he moved back into the alcohol house he began in, so its only a matter of time. This was AFTER many missed days of work to get him settled in, and lots of hospital visits.............. Thankfully though, the hubby laid down the law with him, and told him that if he was gonna drink again,  he was cutting him off.  Time will tell with that one.
My daughter lost a friend. He was a prominent piece in her life for a while, (his dad was my sons football coach for a few years, and his mom was the daycare lady that went above and beyond the necessary when it came to BOTH of my kids, she showed up early to get them, when I had to show up early for work,  she snuck extra snacks to my son cause she was also his team mom,  she administered a whole lotta first aid to my son on the football field.........etc. etc.)  so it has been rough on all of us.....Its always so hard when you lose a child.   He was riding his bike without a helmet, and got hit by a car, in a coma for 5 days, and has now valiantly donated his organs.
My one and only sister in law has lost her mom to cancer.  She was an extraordinary woman.  I hate to say it out loud, but I think I liked her more than my own mother in law who is now living in her own little bubble in Florida,  acting like the past few years never existed.
With all that, and various other "personal tradgedies" the past few months have been rough.  My stress level has been through the roof, and Im ashamed to say that I actually went on a bender,  ended up hanging over the bathtub, telling my hubby I hated him, and begged for my mommy......who showed up, took care of me, and didnt laugh....cant say the same about my dad though....................I guess you could say that I dont do stress very well.  No,  Im pretty good under stress......just hit my limit I guess.  It was rough for a while, so I avoided everything I loved.  I didnt take pictures, and I didnt come here to vent,  I just balled up into a little ball, and watched TV for a month or so.  I suppose all my drunk confessions to the hubby didnt help either, but at the same time it did.  While he didnt like me very much for a while,  he also did a little soul searching, and realized that I was obviously in way over my head,  and started to pitch in with this marriage. So things are getting better.  My plan is to come back so I could throw my witty banter out there to the internet world.  Because really??? What else could go wrong in my world???
Oh, and I got my laptop back..............and everything was still there!!! Work, well, that is a whole nother post in itself....................
Stay tuned people, and if your still there,,,,, thanks for hanging in there.

8 comments:

  1. Glad to have you back. Just proves to everybody what a strong woman you truly are!

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  2. I'm so glad you're back!! I was wondering where you were.

    You've had a hell of a few months there woman, but glad to see you're surviving and I hope things just keep getting better for you.

    xo

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  3. Bless you! Life can be so darn hard and overwhelming. It sure can take a toll. Good to see you!

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  4. BIG HUG!!! I'm glad you are back but I'm sorry you've been through so much. Just keep repeating to yourself, "I WILL get through this" That's the only thing keeping me sane these days.

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  5. sounds like you've had a rough go of it lately. :( glad to have you back, i hope things start getting better!

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  6. PS: Can you email me so I have your email address (at yesthatislovely {at} gmail {dot} com) or update your Blogger profile with it so I can reply to your comments.

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  7. I am HERE, and alive !

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IEPp3eV-XQ

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