Thursday, October 18, 2012

Doggie with a death wish.

Dear Suicidal Dog,

I would appreciate it if the next time you decide to end your mangy  life by flinging your stupid body in front of a car,  you would wait til I pass by.

The thing is,  I will not help you commit suicide,  I just wont.

I value life on this planet,  and no matter how much I told myself:  "hit the dog, hit the dog, hit the dog" ..... in the end,  I swerved.

(the last human assisted doggy suicide I participated in,  entailed extensive body work to the company truck,  and I just cant do that to my car)

Thankfully the guy in the lane next to me knew I wouldnt have the balls to "hit the dog" and he moved out my swerving asses way....

So next time,  wait for the chick behind me,  she was applying mascara, and wouldnt have even saw you. 


Sincerely,

Choleesa

9 comments:

  1. Heff considers himself "The Hitler Of Asphalt". If it gets in my way (or in my general vicinity), it's DEAD.

    I've got more meat in my grill than Kendra Wilkinson at an NBA game.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh Heff!! You just crack me up!!!

      Im gonna give you a call next time the Dilda is crossing the street

      Delete
    2. Where's my snare drum and crash cymbal? BTW, do you only clean the meat out of your grill post coitus also?

      Delete
  2. If it's one of the unimportant breeds you should just hit it.

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  3. So glad you didn't hit it and didn't have an accident trying to miss it.

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  4. Why do animals insist on using us as their means to an end? And I do mean that literally. I have helped two different birds out of their misery by being in the right place, at the right time as they flew right smack into my car. It's horrifying.

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  5. Sorry Cho, that sux.. I hate why can't it ever be a cat?

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